


Happy Easter

by Midnightprincess



Series: Ziam for the Holidays [6]
Category: Little Mix (Band), One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angry Louis, Dinner, Drunk Louis, Easter, Hangover, M/M, On the Road Again Tour, Sad Harry, Sad Liam, Sad Niall, Sad Zayn, Texting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-16
Updated: 2015-04-16
Packaged: 2018-03-23 05:28:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,621
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3756157
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Midnightprincess/pseuds/Midnightprincess
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There is only one thing Liam wants for Easter. He doesn't expect to get it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Happy Easter

**Author's Note:**

> So after some soul searching and a little encouragement from friends I have decided to continue this fic despite what has happened. Sorry for the delay but Easter brought Spring Break and I spent most of the time hanging out with friends and doing hw instead of writing. But it's done now and I hope you all enjoy it.

            _“I’m sorry Liam I just can’t. I can’t do this anymore. I love you but I have to look out for myself for once. When you get back we’ll talk and figure things out. But until then I’m sorry. I’m leaving the band.”_

 

            That was a week ago. March 24th. The news dropped the next day on the 25th. Zayn was leaving. No Zayn was gone. He wasn’t coming back to finish the tour or even record the next album. He was leaving the band and he was doing it now. Liam knew that Zayn had been suffering with the fame and the pressure. He knew the older boy blamed his career for the loss of Perrie but was happy for it because he got Liam. All of the boys had a feeling Zayn was reaching the end of his rope but they never expected it to happen this soon.

            After that call with Zayn Liam’s not sure what happened exactly. He knows that he tweeted something positive, as did the other boys. He knows that they performed their South Africa shows well and sang for Zayn as best as they could. But it was all disconnected. Like he was watching himself perform rather than him doing it. Louis had been a mess since. Drinking too much and fighting with anyone who was willing to talk to him. Liam found himself next to Niall a lot, the Irish lad trying to figure out a way to work the show without Zayn. But his heart wasn’t really into it. Harry on the other hand was trying to cheer everyone up. He encouraged them to write and sing. No one wanted to but they tried for Harry’s sake. Poor Harry. He cried for hours after Liam told the boys. Normally the one to lean on others Harry had to be the rock since his rock was falling apart. It was tough to watch. But no matter how many times Louis yelled and cursed at Harry the boy simply smiled and tried to help. They were falling apart while telling the fans that they were going to be okay.

            “Let me try again,” Harry pleaded during rehearsal.

            They were in Cape Town going over the setlist with different boys singing Zayn’s parts. For the most part it worked but there were a few songs they just couldn’t do without Zayn. Little Things, Diana, Best Song Ever, and You & I were particularly difficult. It was decided early on that the fans would sing Zayn’s part in Little Things and You & I but Diana and Best Song Ever had to stay. To make matters worse a lot of their songs had high notes that only Zayn could hit. The high notes gave the effect of the song and without them it was painfully obvious that something was missing. Harry and Liam had been chosen to take over these notes but both boys were having difficulty. Currently Harry was trying not to cry as he tried to hit Zayn’s note in Diana. Sure on stage he could play it off like he was having fun and just messed it up. But Harry wanted to get it right and just couldn’t. Liam suggested that Louis sing it since his range was higher than the rest of theirs but Louis told him to keep his fucking mouth shut. Poor guy was hung over. God they were a mess.

            “Harry breathe from your diaphragm and try again,” their vocal coach ordered. Harry nodded and tried the note again. Getting close as Liam began to sing. Liam had offered to do all the high notes but some of them he couldn’t hit and others didn’t work for where he had to sing. So Harry with his super deep voice got stuck with it.

            “Why don’t we take a break?” Niall suggested.

            “Yeah let’s,” Louis said getting up from where he was laying down and leaving the stage.

            Guess that settled it. The boys put their mics down and headed backstage. Immediately Harry headed for the loo where he would probably cry. Louis, being the wonderful boyfriend that he was, laid on the couch and put a hoodie over his head. His signal to be left alone. Niall took a seat across from Louis and just looked loss. Liam sat next to him pulling out his phone. Liam had been texting with Zayn since the announcement. Mostly just checking up on him and making sure he was alright. Zayn always replied with the same. He was doing well and just trying to take some time for himself. That he missed Liam and the boys and hoped to see them when they returned to London in April. Zayn never asked how Liam and the boys were doing. He knew better.

            Seeing there were no texts and nothing demanding happening on Twitter Liam went to text Zayn, stopping when he saw the date. It was March 30th. They were performing April 1st and then again April 4th in Dubai. That meant they had two days off. Two days was just enough time to go see Zayn and beg him to return. Or at least consider returning. Two days was all he would need. Jumping up Liam headed out to find Paul, scaring the crap out of Niall.

Surprisingly it was not hard to convince Paul to let him leave for two days to speak to Zayn. The man actually looked relieved when he suggested it. Unfortunately all the flights left in the evening so Liam couldn’t leave Cape Town till April 2nd. He would then have to leave the evening of April 3rd to make it back to Dubai in time for the show. He was about to give up and just talk to Zayn during the break when the boy offered to meet him in London when he mentioned he was going to visit. That was a good sign. So after a good as it’s going to be performance Liam made his way back to London.

 

 

            “Welcome home,” Zayn said as Liam opened the door to his flat.

            “What are you doing here?” Liam asked dropping his carry on.

            “I...wanted to see you.” With that Zayn surged forward and kissed Liam. Liam returned the kiss quickly but backed off.

            “Sorry I...I can’t do that right now.” Liam moved away from the door and flopped on the couch.

            “Right sorry.”

            “It’s okay. Come here.”

            Zayn came over to sit on the couch with Liam, cuddling into the boy’s side after prompting.

            “Well you certainly look better,” Liam said after looking Zayn over.

            “I _feel_ better.” Zayn snuggled closer. “I’m sleeping better, I’m more relaxed. This is best I’ve felt in years.”

            “Glad it’s working out of you,” Liam deadpanned.

            “I’m sorry. I know...I know this is difficult for everyone but I just…”

            “I know, I know you’re looking out for yourself. But Zayn is this really what you want?” Liam pulled away to face his boyfriend. “We’ve done so much together and gotten so far. We’re like the most successful boy band ever and you just want to let that go? Right in the middle of tour?”

            “If you came here to convince me to come back forget it.” Zayn got up and moved to the kitchen.

            Liam ran his hand over his face. This wasn’t going how he wanted. “No I...I’m not trying to make you change your mind.” Liam went to the kitchen and pulled Zayn into a hug. “I get it, you weren’t happy in the band.”

            “Do you really get it Liam?” Zayn asked pulling away. “Do you really understand what I went through? Yes we all started as nobodies that became famous overnight. We all struggled with the press and trying to be normal while being mega stars. We all went through not being able to go where we want and do what we want but do you understand that I can’t live like that? You guys are out going. You love the crowds and the screaming and the pulling and shoving. You love the long hours and the writing and recording and the going and going and going but I….I don’t.”

            “Zayn, come on. We all have parts of this life we don’t like. Niall hates getting crowded, and Louis hates when the press tries to talk about him or his family -”

            “Yeah but I don’t like any of it. I never did.”

            Liam looked at Zayn for a moment. “What?”

            “I never wanted to be in a band.” Zayn ran his hands through his hair. “When Simon came to us about getting signed I wanted to say no.”

            “Why didn’t you?”

            “Cause you all were so excited for it to happen and I was worried Simon wouldn’t sign us if it wasn’t the entire group. And then we got huge and people started depending on us and I just felt trapped. But the money was good and traveling was fun so I figured I could put up with it….until I couldn’t anymore.”

            “How long have you been feeling this way?”

            “Trapped?”

            “No like you couldn’t put up with it anymore?”

            “After the Take Me Home tour.”

            “What?” Liam surged forward and hugged his boyfriend. “Why didn’t you say something? Why didn’t you tell anyone? We could’ve taken a break or had a meeting or worked something out.”

            Zayn pulled back from the younger boy. “Could we really though? Could we honestly have asked for a break or told them no? You know how management is.” Zayn looked over to Liam to see his kicked puppy look. “Look I tried to put up with it. But after the whole thing with Perrie and now the pictures from Thailand….I just...couldn’t anymore.”

            “But what about us?”

            “What?”

            “What about the band or the fans? What about me?”

            “Liam this isn’t about you.”

            “Sophia broke up with me last year because I was always on the road and she felt I didn’t have time for her.”

            “Sophia wasn’t a celebrity. She didn’t get it.”

            “Perrie left you for the same reason.”

            Zayn looked at Liam shocked. How could he? He not only questioned Zayn’s loyalty but also threw the Perrie issue in his face. Didn’t he get that he was miserable? That he wasn’t happy being in the band? That he was doing so much better as a person since he left? “Are you really going to drag me back into something I hate just to help your insecurity?”

            “Insecurity?”

            “Yes insecurity. You are so worried that I will leave you. That I don’t love you. That you will force me into something that is clearly not healthy for me just to make sure I stay with you.”

            “No Zayn that’s not what I want.”

            “Then what do you want?”

            “I want you back!”

            Liam and Zayn stared at each other in the silent kitchen. Chests heaving with emotions and hurt. Liam was the first to break the silence.

            “We are a mess without you. Louis is drinking too much and fighting with Harry, Niall can’t get his life together, Harry is trying to be the rock on the band when he’s really a sponge, and I’m…...I’m just lost. We can’t…..I can’t do this without you.”

            “I can’t fix all your problems Liam.”

            “I know…...I know you can’t. But can’t you just finish the tour? If not for my or the bands sake then for the fans. They paid good money to see five boys. You can’t take that away from them.”

            Zayn was silent for a moment. Looking between Liam’s sad face and the floor. He did feel bad about the fans. That was the last issue he was having, the aching guilt that he let them down. That people came out to see him and wouldn’t be able to. He knew he was important to a lot of people. Was it fair for him just to leave so suddenly? Would finishing the tour be all that bad?

            Zayn wasn’t sure anymore.

            “Liam I came to talk about us,” he said looking at his boyfriend. “I thought that us and the band were two different things. I thought that we could exist without One Direction.” Zayn waited for Liam to agree. To say that he was right. That they would make it. That they would work this out the minute he got back in England. But Liam stayed silent. “Guess I was wrong.” Zayn turned and left before Liam could even unfreeze.

 

 

            Liam know he should go after him. Should try to understand and fight for Zayn to be left alone. But Liam just couldn’t. He couldn’t move. Zayn wasn’t happy in the band? Ever? The past five years have been hell for him? Liam, who claimed to love him, didn’t notice. No wonder Zayn left. He was suffering and no one noticed. No one cared. Liam grabbed his phone and texted Zayn.

            _You’re right I did come here to convince you to return to the band or at least finish out the tour. I understand now that you can’t and I respect your decision. Try to relax and hang with friends and I’ll talk to you when I get back. No matter what I still love you._

            Liam stared at his phone for ten minutes waiting for Zayn to reply. He didn’t. Liam then decided to text Niall. Louis and Harry were too fragile at the moment for this.

            _Tried to talk to Zayn. He’s not coming back. Sorry._

            Niall texted back instantly though Liam had no idea what time it was in Dubai.

            _Got it. Thanks for trying mate._

            With that done Liam got up and headed to the bedroom. Might as well get some sleep. He had a long day ahead of him.   

 

            Zayn didn’t know how he ended up here. One moment he was leaving Liam’s flat, the next he was standing in front of his house. He hadn’t been back since he left for tour. Before that he spent most of his time at Liam’s. He considered moving in with Liam once the tour was over. This house wasn’t a home for him anymore. Not after Perrie left. Deciding he had nowhere better to go Zayn went into the house. He was surprised to find Perrie sitting on the couch watching TV.

            “Perrie what are you doing here?” Zayn asked closing the door.

            “I could ask you the same thing,” Perrie said turning off the telly. She looked at him and frowned. “What’s wrong?”

            Zayn wasn’t going to tell her. It wasn’t her problem anymore. He had broken it off with her. He lost the privilege to dump all his problems on her. But he couldn’t help it. The minute she looked at him with her lovely concerned face Zayn just broke.

            He told her everything. About him and Liam, how he’d been feeling on the On the Road Again tour, what drove him home, and ultimately his decision to leave the band. Perrie already knew most of his emotional issues with joining the band so she sat quietly and listened. Only when he was silent for a minute did she speak up.

            “Well if you’re so happy to be done, why are you so sad?” Perrie asked simply.

            “I don’t know!” Zayn groaned putting his head in his hands. “I am happy. I’ve never felt so relaxed and in control since I started this whole thing. But something keeps nagging at the back of my head. Keeps stopping me from being completely relaxed.” Zayn looked over at Perrie was still sitting quietly and listening. She was perfect. “I thought maybe it was the fact that I left Liam. But I just saw him and it seems to have made it worse.”

            “Maybe it’s the fans.”

            “The fans?”

            “Yes Zayn, as much as you complained about not being able to go out or do anything you still loved the fans. I know that this whole thing has been hard for you but you’ve stayed so long because you didn’t want to disappoint the fans.”

            “And now I have. But I had to……..I had to look out for myself. I can’t do that and make the fans happy.”

            “Maybe you can?”

            “What do you mean?”

            “Go back for the rest of the tour. It’ll be like a farewell thing. The fans will get the closer that they need and you will be able to leave at the end of it.”

            “You think I should?”

            “Honestly the moment the announcement came out I wondered why you wouldn’t at least finish the tour.” Perrie then reached over and squeezed Zayn’s shoulder. “All that’s left is Europe and America. Those were your original fans. They deserve to see you one last time.”

Zayn sighed. She was right. He was still burdened with the thought that he disappointed the fans. Maybe finishing tour wouldn’t be so bad. That would also solve his problems with Liam at the moment. Instead of answering Perrie he just took her hand as he sent off an email to his lawyer.

            “Thanks Pez,” he said looking over at the girl. “I sent an email to my lawyers. We’ll see what they say.”

            “You’ll probably get paid less.”

            “That’s fine. I’ve made enough money to last me awhile.”

            “Is it true that you’ll be releasing an album with Naughty boy?”

            “It was an option given to me but after how he’s been acting I’m not sure anymore.”

            “Oh yeah I saw that on Twitter. Good thing Louis is on your side.”

            “I know right.” Zayn laughed for a moment before his smile faded. “I really hurt him by leaving. I hurt all of them.”

            “I’m sure they’ll forgive you and will understand.” Perrie removed her hand from his and turned to face him. “Now tell me every little detail about you and Liam.”

            “You’re okay will it?”

            “If you asked me a few months ago I would not have but I’ve gotten over it.”

            “I’m sorry about all this.”

            “Then make it up to me?”

            “How?”

            “By telling me every little detail about you and Liam.”

            Zayn sighed but then turned to gossip about his relationship. One he hoped would still be there later.

 

            Liam was tired. He flew to Dubai, did a concert, and then flew to back to England. He had planned to go home for Easter dinner but now he couldn’t manage it. Luckily he planned on surprising his family so they didn’t expect him. The concert was actually their best since Zayn left. It seems that the boys finally got the closer they needed and were planning on moving forward. Liam and Louis would start writing the new album and they’ll record while on tour again. Sure they will miss Zayn but they respected his decision. But that was all for the future. Right now Liam just wanted to his bed. Maybe he wouldn’t even go to bed, the couch was very comfortable. All his tiredness left him though when he entered his flat to smell food.

            “Hello?” Liam asked walking through the flat. He entered the kitchen to see Zayn laying a pretty impressive spread. “What’s all this?”

            “An apology,” Zayn said placing the food on the table. “I’m sorry for leaving so suddenly. It’s wasn’t fair to you.”

            “No I’m sorry I shouldn’t have tried to force you to come back. I should’ve respected your decision.”

            “It’s okay.” Zayn fixed the place settings some more before walking over to Liam. “I know why you did it and I appreciate the concern. Why don’t you get comfortable while I finish in here?”

            Liam only nodded and went to the bedroom. He changed in sweats and washed his hands before returning to the kitchen. He saw the Zayn added candles to the spread.

            “Welcome to your romantic Easter dinner,” Zayn said pulling out Liam’s chair.

            “I don’t think those two things go together,” Liam chucked looking at the food. It was Italian. Since when could Zayn cook Italian? Better yet since when could Zayn cook at all?        “How did you make this?”

            “I didn’t. It’s from that Italian place you like.”

            Ah that’s how. “Thank you but you didn’t have to do all this.”

            “I know but I wanted to. I know what you wanted to see your family tonight but because you came to see my stupid self you’re too tired to go.”

            “How did you know?”

            Zayn poured them both a glass of wine before speaking. “I’ve been talking to Paul.”

            Liam paused in sipping his wine. “Why have you been talking to Paul?” He tried not to sound hopeful but he couldn’t help it.

            “I’m coming back for the rest of the tour.”

            Liam almost choked. “What?”

            “Just for the tour. It will be a sort of farewell thing. The lawyers are still hashing out the details and its being kept super-secret but I got the green light.”

            “Are you sure?”

            “Yes babe, I….I want to do this. I’ve been feeling bad about leaving the fans hanging and this is the best thing I can think of to do.”

            “Okay,” Liam said looking down at his food. He was so happy. Zayn was coming back. Even if it was just for the rest of tour it was something. They would figure out the rest later. Liam looked back up at his love. “Thank you.”

            “I didn’t do it for you. I did it for the fans.” Liam laughed as Zayn pick up his wine glass. “Happy Easter, Liam.”

            Liam picked up his wine glass and toasted as well. “Happy Easter, Zayn

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Sorry that there is no smut in this section but I needed to get the story on track in the most believable manner. Next section will be Cinco de Mayo, hopefully I'll have it out on time.


End file.
